Mulder: Keep going, FBI woman.
Scully: Mulder? What are you doing? Why are you sitting in my bedroom in the dark?
Mulder: It was too crowded in my apartment, I couldn't sleep.
Scully: I'm not kidding, Mulder.
Mulder: Good, cause neither am I. There's a dead man on the floor in my apartment
and it's only a matter of time before he starts to stink the place up.
If only the tragedy had been mine alone, it might have been more easy tonight to bring this journey to its end.
I'm here tonight as a friend, Agent Mulder.
Mulder: All because of this thing I'm looking for.
Bill Scully Jr: It's what? Little green aliens?
Mulder: Yeah...Little green aliens.
Bill Scully Jr: You're one sorry son of a bitch. Not a whole lot more to say.
(on the phone)Sorry son of a bitch speaking.
Skinner: They're cleaning up, taking everything away.
Mulder: Not everything. Scully's cancer's gone into remission.
Skinner: That's unbelievable news.
Mulder: It's the best news I could have ever heard.
Frohike: You look like a gentleman who'll appreciate 33 channels of crystal clear
Mulder: No thanks, handsome.
Frohike: Ah, a man of distinction...[Mulder walks away] Punk ass.
Do I look like Geraldo to you? Don't lie to me like Geraldo, I'm not Geraldo!
Byers: You want the truth?
Mulder: Yeah. I want the truth.
Byers: You might want to sit down, this is going to take a while. The truth is... none of us is safe. Secret elements within the US government seek to surveil us and control our lives.
Frohike: Tell him about the hotel Bibles...
Byers: Yeah. I'm coming to that. It all started with Susanne Modeski...
Scully: Mulder. We've got this conference, they're waiting.
Mulder: Yeah. How do I say this without using any negative words, Scully.
Scully: You want me to tell them that you're not going to make it to this year's teamwork seminar.
Mulder: Yes. You see that? We don't need that conference. We have communication like that — unspoken. You know what I'm thinking.
Mulder: Who cut the cheese?
Scully: Since we won't be making it to the conference.
Scully: However, I must remind you this goes against the Bureau's policy of male and female agents consorting in the same motel room while on assignment.
Mulder: Try any of that Tailhook crap on me, Scully, I'll kick your ass.
Scully: You ever thought seriously about dying?
Mulder: Yeah, once. When I was at the Ice Capades.
[Scully tries to manoeuvre Mulder into her lap to keep him warm]
Mulder: I don't want to wrestle.
Mulder: I think nature is supremely indifferent to whether we live or die. I mean if you're lucky you get 75 years. If you're really lucky you get 80 years. And if you're extraordinarily lucky you get to have 50 of those years with a decent head of hair.
Scully: I guess it's like Las Vegas — the house always wins.
Scully: [reading] I got your name off the TV. Some... lady on the Jerry Springer show who had a werewolf baby said you came to her house. Well I got her story beat by a mile, so maybe you'll want to come see me too. Sincerely, Shaineh Berkowitz.
Mulder: Scully, do you think it's too soon to get my own 1-900 number?
That's not a place you want to burn a guy.
Mulder: This is all wrong, Scully. This is not how the story's supposed to end.
Scully: What do you mean?
Mulder: Dr Frankenstein pays for his evil ambitions, yes. But the monster is
supposed to escape, to go search for his bride.
Scully: There's not going to be any bride, Mulder. Not in this story.
Mulder: Where's the writer...? I want to speak to the writer.
Bill: You really think Melissa had a baby?
Scully: Yes. I do.
Bill: She called you from beyond the grave to tell you that? Sounds like something that partner of yours would say.
No matter how much you love this little girl, she is a miracle that was never meant to be, Scully.
Mulder: Okay, look. This is all you need to know. Do not trust this man. Do not talk to him. Do not engage him in conversation. Even if he is unarmed, approach him with extraordinary caution and then only with adequate backup.
US Marshall: So what's adequate backup?
Mulder: Adequate backup? Every cop you can lay your hands on.
He's a very considerate man.
Scully: 12 pounds, 9 ounces.
Mulder: All that came out of his stomach?
Scully: Most of it. A small amount in his lungs is what killed him.
Mulder: Is it possible that he took the term 'mud pie' literally?
Scully: Well, I'm sure if Mr Rich were alive he would find some humour in that.
Hey Scully, is this demonstration of boyish agility turning you on at all?
Mulder: Hell, maybe you don't know what you're looking for.
Scully: Like evidence of conjuring of the black arts or... shamanism, divination, Wicca or any kind of pagan or neo-pagan practice. Charms, cards, familiars, blood stones or hex signs or any of the ritual tableau associated with the occult, sensory, abudan, mukamba or any kind of high or low magic.
Mulder: Marry me.
Wow, I wish I could help you out. I'm just...on vacation.
Scully: Well, maybe we need to keep our minds open to... extreme possibilities.
Chief Bonsaint: Okay, but aren't you on vacation?
Oh, I don't know. I think some things are better left unexplained.
Esther Nairn: Are these the brain donors that nearly got us incinerated?
Mulder: Don't let their looks fool you.
Scully: Your name is Esther Nairn?
Frohike: She is so hot!
Esther Nairn: Are you going to take off these cuffs or do I have to do this with my tongue?
Mulder: You don't want to take a vote.
Yeah, I found something down in Fairfax County. A derelict chicken farm with a T3 connection.
Mulder: I did not overreact, Ronnie Strickland was a vampire!
Scully: Where's your proof?
Mulder: You're my proof! You were there! Okay, now you're scaring me. I want to hear exactly what you're going to tell Skinner.
Scully: Oh, you want our stories straight.
Mulder: No, no, I didn't say that! I just want to hear it the way you saw it.
Scully: I don't feel comfortable with that.
Mulder: Prison, Scully! Your cell mate's nickname is going to be Large Marge. She's going to read a lot of Gertrude Stein.
Come on, Scully, get those little legs moving!
Scully: He had big buck teeth?
Mulder: He had a...slight overbite.
Scully: No he didn't. And that's significant how?
Mulder: I'm just trying to be thorough.
Have you noticed that this man's shoes are untied?
Scully: Mulder, please just keep reminding him you were drugged.
Mulder: Will you stop that!
Scully: Couldn't hurt.
Mulder: Just stop it.
Skinner: Scully? Mulder?
[They jump to their feet]
Mulder: I was drugged!
A conspiracy, wrapped in a plot, inside a government agenda.
Mulder: You...you try to reveal what's hidden, you try to incite people with the facts, but they'd rather believe some insane nonsense, refusing to believe what our government is capable of.
Scully: You've come a long way, Mulder.
Mulder: Yeah, and still nobody believes me.
One more anal-probing, gyro-pyro levitating ecoplasm alien anti-matter story and I'm going to take out my gun and shoot somebody.
Scully: What time is it?
Mulder: What time is it? It's time to thank your lucky stars.
Scully: Why are you laughing?
Mulder: I'm not laughing at you. I'm just very happy to be standing here talking to you. That's all.
I heard about this office. It really is in the basement.
Scully: Mulder, when I met you five years ago, you told me that your sister had been abducted by aliens...that that event had marked you so deeply that nothing else mattered. I didn't believe you, but I followed you on nothing more than your faith that the truth was out there. Based not on fact, not on science, but on your memories that your sister was taken from you. Your memories were all that you had.
Mulder: I don't trust those memories now.
Scully: Yeah, well whether you trust them or not, they've led you here...and me. But I have no memories to either trust or distrust. And if you ask me now to follow you again, to stand behind you in what you now believe — without knowing what
happened to me out there, without those memories — I can't...I won't.
Krycek: You must be losing it, Mulder. I can beat you with one hand.
Mulder: Isn't that how you like to beat yourself? [Krycek cocks gun] If those were
my last words, I can do better.
Agent Dales: X-File?
Dorothy Bahnsen: Yes. Unsolved cases. I file them under 'X'.
Agent Dales: Why don't you file them under 'U'... for Unsolved?
Dorothy Bahnsen: That's what I did until I ran out of room. Plenty of room in the 'X's'.
I hate the way you see me.
You know the thing I find most surprising about this case is you. You are one sceptical guy, Agent Mulder.
Mulder: Scully, look at this. Agnostic gospels, amina, Book of J, Apocrypha... I'm surprised there's nothing here from Jesus Christ Superstar.
Scully: What kind of church is this?
Mulder: There's no telling.
I know people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones blah blah blah, but that guy is paranoid!
If you don't hear from me by midnight...
feed my fish.
August Bremer: Are you a believer?
Mulder: I have my beliefs.
August Bremer: You willing to die for them?
Mulder: I'd prefer it didn't come to that.
Mulder: I must have done something to piss him off.
Scully: What do you mean?
Mulder: Get stuck with this jerk-off assignment. Or have I finally reached that magic point in my career where every time somebody sees Bigfoot or the Virgin Mary on a tortilla, I get called out of my basement ward to offer my special insight on the matter.
Scully: You're saying 'I' a lot. I heard 'we'. Nor do I assume that this case is just a waste of our time.
Mulder: Well, not yours anyways. There's no reason both of us should go to Chicago. I'll take care of it.
Mulder: I'm Monster Boy, right?
Scully, you have to believe me. Nobody else on this whole damn planet does or ever will. You're my one in five billion.
Scully: I want you guys to tell me who Diana Fowley is.
Byers: Diana Fowley. Geez, we haven't heard that name in a while.
Scully: Then you know her.
Byers: Well... yeah.
Frohike: She was... Mulder's chickadee when he just got out of the Academy. Good looking.
Scully: Well she claims to have worked closely with him for a while.
Langly: She was there when he discovered the X-Files.
Mulder: This was all strategised, every move. I just couldn't see it. It all was part of a plan.
Scully: Mulder, whatever you may believe, this time they may have won.
season 6 here.